Black Dynamite Vs. Weng Weng
Notes on the weekend. Saw Dessa perform this last Saturday at the Pizza Luce Block Party. From my vantage point at the side of the stage, one thing became abundantly clear: she must work out. Cutest. Rapper. EVER.
Now that that is out of the way, we can continue. One of my associates suggested that I do a comparison/contrast of two crime-fighting vagabonds to see who would win in a fight.
I’ll get Weng Weng out of the way first, because quite frankly, he creeps the hell out of me. If there’s anything in this world that scares me, mimes and ventriloquist dummies are tied for number one, and weird short people with bad haircuts are a close second. After seeing this video, I keep imagining that I’m going to wake up in the middle of the night, with him standing next to my bed, sticking his fingers in my mouth. I believe he became an alcoholic and died in the early ’90’s, but with the amount of action he’s getting from the chickadees in this video, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a spawn of Weng Weng within our ranks.
Starring in an exploitation of blaxploitation films, or exlploiblaxploitation, is Black Dynamite. Words can’t really describe how vastly superior he is to Weng Weng.
I’m going to say that Black Dynamite would absolutely dominate Weng Weng in every way possible, proceed to dip him in mustard, put him in a sandwich, eat him, digest him, and produce a bowel movement with an afro and mustache.
Might as well start the week off with a bangin’ Blong. Cancer Bats covering the Beastie Boys.