I Will Fill The Gaping Void That Dear Abby’s Death Has Created
It has been a week since Abigail Van Buren’s death. In tribute, I have begun doling out advice to the throbbing masses of lost souls who need a lodestar in their bleak, confusing lives.
Dear Blog: Last month, I spilled some delicious Peanut Butter Sauce on my bare stomach while watching All My Children. Before I had a chance to wipe it up, my dog swooped in and ever so slowly, licked it up. I think I liked that. Are my dog and I dating now? Help!
Confused And Possibly Dating A Dog In Wisconsin
Dear Confused: First off, Peanut Butter Sauce IS delicious! I love the stuff. And yes, you are dating your dog. Maybe go talk to someone, a psychiatrist perhaps, face-to-face, instead of using the vast anonymity of the internet to cloak your depraved experiments with your pets.