How To Translate Rap Lyrics, Volume 2

Greetings. This is a guide for people who don’t understand rap lyrics. One or two people seemed to enjoy the first volume, so here’s round two.

Lyric: “Cruisin’ down the street in my six fo’/Jockin the b*tches, slappin’ the hoes/went to the park to get the scoop/knuckleheads out there cold shootin’ some hoop.” -Eazy E, Boyz-n-the-Hood

Translation: “Driving down the government-funded roadway in my 1964 Chevrolet Impala/I was flirting with females that I found sexually attractive, and using physical violence against promiscuous women for whom I harbor no respect/I then proceeded to the public area set aside for recreation and relaxation, to see if anything interesting was happening, or if any thought-provoking gossip was to be had/The only notable occurence was a bunch of local idiots playing a game of basketball.”

Lyric: (Puff Daddy) “Mase can you please stop smoking La-La?” (Mase) “Puff, why try, I’m a thug, I’ma die high.” -Puff Daddy (featuring Mase), from Can’t Nobody Hold Me Down

Translation: (Puff Daddy) “Mase, I am imploring you to cease the inhalation of this mildy intoxicating chemical.” (Mase) “Puff, is it really worth the effort? The life I live is a depraved tapestry of liquor, thievery, and buffoonery. I fear that I have lost control, and that these actions will inevitably lead to my untimely demise.”

Lyric: “WHAAAAAAAAT?!???!!!? OOOOOKKKAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!” -Lil Jon, from every song he’s ever done

Translation: “Due to intellectual shortcomings, my own inherent laziness, and lack of forsight, I have unwittingly pigeonholed myself into an inescapable black hole of creative bankuptcy that has reduced me to a mere caricature of myself.”

Lyric: “We got Magnum Brown, Shoothki, Valoothki/Super-calafraga-hestik-alagoothki/You can put that in ya don’t know what I said book/Took-look-yuk-duk-wuk.” -Flavor Flav of Public Enemy, from Cold Lampin’ With Flavor

Translation: ???????

Lyric: “I’m a freak/I like the girls with the boom/I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.” -Digital Underground, The Humpty Dance

Translation: “I have sexual quirks that are perceived as odd or disturbing compared to “traditional” ways of intercourse/I like a woman with added heft to her girth/I once copulated in the washroom of a popular fast food establishment.”

Blong (Blog Song). Some rap music. Ghetto Supastar. It’s pretty much about my life.