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How Are Everyone’s New Year’s Resolutions Coming Along?

It’s August 8. Have you been keeping up with your New Year’s resolution(s)? Did you lose weight, get a new job, read a book, join a gym,┬ámentor someone, find a mentor, spend more time with your family, quit smoking, get out of debt, give to charity,┬átickle a midget, eat more vegetables, plan a dream vacation,┬ácontrol your anger problems, ride a bike, see what gerbil tastes like, watch less TV, knife-fight a hobo, become more involved in your community, walk more, run more, let a friendly puppy lick peanut butter off your nipples, use the stairs instead of the elevator, eat more whole grains, talk to a long-lost friend, eat less fast food, compliment a stranger, ride around in the back of a pickup truck picking off stray dogs with a shotgun, or make any discernible effort to improve yourself at all?

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