Wika-Wika-Wednesday!

We’re gonna come out swinging today, then come back Friday to help you ease into the weekend like an old man into a hot bath.  Almost three weeks. Amazing.  We are in the process of transforming from the proverbial “ugly duckling” into a full fledged “Hot Swan.”  Since this whole thing started, people have been asking, “Sean, how do you do it, dawwg?” or “damn kid, s#$%#$t is f%^&*ing #$%#$% sick!” A lot of dubious language gets used around here. I myself don’t partake. So I thought I’d walk through a typical day here at YCL. Slimminy Cricket is yapping away to my left, Dan “Four-four” Kelly is on the way with a camera to document the whole thing, so here is the daily breakdown.

5:30AM-Arise. Eat a five egg omelet and freshly squeezed goat milk.

-6AM-Run 6 miles through the neighborhood. Steal newspaper from the German family on 12th Ave. Kick their trashcan over on the way out of the driveway.

7AM-Hot shower. Lounge on fine animal pelts while beautiful women feed me grapes and fan me with palm leaves. Those aren’t cheap this time of year by the way.

8AM-4PM-Take frequent catnaps, occasionally getting up to have a snack.

5PM-Yesterday I actually remembered that I invented coffee energy drinks a few years before they actually came out.It was called Enerchino, for energy and cappuccino, comprised of a “Rip It” energy drink and a cappuccino. It was delicious and I should be a millionaire right now. My friend “The Beard” can back me up on this.

Oh yeah, I’m supposed to talk about that phone. Well here is a mind blowing portrayal of the conceptual Nokia Morph. Supposedly things like this should be out around 2019. They must have been spending a lot of time on this, because the animation quality is from like 1993.